Deep Stuffs

I've been thinking about spirituality for the past few days. I've known for some time that I'm not one for religious faith. I don't know if it's a result of my upbringing or brain chemistry or who knows what else, but I cannot believe in some higher God when He chooses not to provide us with some sort of evidence for His existence.

My train of thought generally leads to a sort of strange half-regret that I don't feel this way. If so many people achieve a great fulfillment in their lives due to this faith, what could I be missing? This is a somewhat disturbing feeling for me, because I generally pride myself in being independent of religious "interference" in my life. The thought that this independence might be damaging rather than helpful just feels wrong.

But then I was thinking again. I don't have blind faith in some magical man who lives in the sky, but I do seem to have a general faith in humanity. Time and time again, reports indicate that many of us don't seem to learn our lessons about responsibility, tolerance, and the dangers of our own weaker natures. (For reference, see "Fox News, Entire History of") Sure, there are plenty of instances of true compassion and goodness, and it is on these that I concentrate. And it's nice to know that some of these acts are based in other forms of faith.

The fact is, it's not entirely our choice whether we have faith in our lives. Either you believe that there is always the potential for betterment, even in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary, or you cease to live in the true sense of the word.


Reading back over that, I seem to make a few huge leaps between my thoughts. Makes sense to me, anyhow.