Bob ARRGH PET PEEVES

Hey kids, it's time again for me to air my grievances on the internet! This is healthy, I assure you. Fortunately, my grievances are often small in nature, and I can typically ignore them without falling prey to acute hypertension.

Today! On the pet peeves show: ungrammatical facebook status entries. "Real" examples:

• Jane Doe OMG her flight got cancelled!
• Alan Smithee is it naptime yet?
• John Q. Public is SIGN THIS NOW!!!
• Dennis Kucinich RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE TOMORROW/starstruck from the DEMOCRATIC NATIONAL CONVENTION.

I'd like to say that these people lack basic understanding about how facebook status updates work, but I don't actually believe that. They are just lazy. They do not care. Is it so difficult to spend an extra second or two making sure your status makes goddamn sense?

Of course, none of this actually matters. My complaint has no redeeming value as social commentary or parody. But that's exactly what makes it a problem! These assholes have turned me into the guy sitting in his basement penning a manifesto and preaching revolution on the "social networking intersphere" or whatever the fuck they're calling it these days. I have become what I hate the most. Next thing you know I'll be "twittering" my progress in getting facebook to change their whole status setup.

On an unrelated note, I was looking up some foreign book titles at work on Google Translate, and apparently the "auto-detect language" feature recognizes Slovenian and Hungarian, but is unable to translate them. I like a computer program that knows its limits.