I Like Ike

Here's a gem from what I can only assume is literature promoting Dwight D. Eisenhower's bid for the presidency:


I'll check into it later.

I am amazing at guessing

Thank you.

More Things I Have Baked/Cooked/Watched

Pumpkin Gingerbread: B. Not bad, but a bit too heavy for my tastes. Maybe with more leavening?

French Onion Soup: A-. An excellent soup, but it could use some more hearty flavoring, maybe by addition of some meat, rather than beef and chicken broths. Also, I had it with large quantities of cheap wine - always an excellent serving suggestion.

Carrot Cake: A. Oh man, this thing is good. Plus, it's fuckin' huge. As my friend put it, "Oh my God, Bob, that's an actual cake!"

And now, a 3-haiku review of Seraphim Falls:

Both Pierce Brosnan and
Liam Neeson have accents
of a western sort.

Holy shit, you will
not believe what Pierce busts out
of in this movie.

I would recommend
this film to those who enjoy
films about tough dudes.

That should about cover it.

A List of Things I Have Baked

No-Knead Bread: B+, more if it came out of the pan in one piece.
Chocolate Chip Cookies: A-
Apple Crisp: B-, also the recipe came from a creepy homeschooler's blog
Applesauce Spice Cake: A (this cake is amazing)

Up Next:
Pumpkin Gingerbread

Notable Missing From This List:
Myself

wtf

I just noticed. Is this some kind of poo blog, now? Because I might be able to make some money with that.

This Must End

Would you like to know how bored I am?

This is how bored I am:

I just pooed. Not because I had to poo, mind you, but because it was an activity that took up a small amount of my time.

That is how bored I am.


AAARRRGGGHHHH.

Don't Do Boredom, Kids

Horrible things happen. Case in point:

This is Pooizard, the second evolution of Poomander, after Poomeleon. If your next question is: "Say, Bob, did you stumble upon drawings of Pokemon having sex with each other while searching for source material for this image?", DO NOT ASK THAT QUESTION.

The Countdown: Continued

Twilight Princess finished in just under 46 hours. I am now playing further into it to beat the Cave of Ordeals and find all the golden bugs. Poes too, maybe. Why am I doing this? Because apparently, I hate the sun.

Madden 08 in 5 days. Oh yeah.

Sabbatical Over

Ok kids, a few things:

Jesus. H. Christ.

Oh, hey, I got a Wii! This is why I have seen almost zero movies since my last update. (Note the "almost.") Check mark next to Resident Evil 4 in 21 hours, 47 minutes. Over 30 hours into Twilight Princess and still going strong.

Knocked Up
A filthy movie that's quite amusing, but for a bit too long.

Holy Update, Batman!

Kung Fu Hustle
It has some bizarre moments for a (good) kung fu movie, but I'm still not sure I'd call it a comedy.

Fearless
At first I was a bit disappointed by the whole "man discovers himself through discipline and honor" storyline, but then I remembered something: I was watching a fucking martial arts movie.

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
Certainly a passable film, and I'd probably like it more by comparison if I had seen the first two.

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
For a movie that lost both Alfonso Cuarón and John Williams, it does remarkably well.

Live Free or Die Hard
A movie I was entertained by for 2 hours in exchange for some of my money.

A Special Note to the Guy Working at the Electronics Counter at Target Yesterday.

FUCK YOU, ASSHOLE.

One Sentence Movie Reviews: Trilingual Edition

Last Life in the Universe
This movie is a potent catalyst for sitting on your couch, looking at colors, and thinking about life.

It's probably just the mood I was in today, but I really liked this movie. The pacing reminds me a little of another film I didn't care for, Lost in Translation. But where LiT was frustrating with its lack of action, I let LLitU wash over me. The slightly surreal plot combined with the impressive soundtrack and the intensely saturated cinematography makes for a viewing experience which feels like you're underwater, and it was exactly what I was looking for in a movie today.

It was shot on video, which I found a little distracting, but not overly so. Looking at IMDB, it seems LiT is actually 10 minutes shorter than the still brief 112 minutes of LLitU, but I remember it feeling like forever.

I have another of this director's films, 6ixtynin9, which I'll have to watch soon.

One Sentence Movie Reviews, Dystopian Future Edition

Children of Men
One of the most powerful explorations of mankind's propensity for extremes that I've seen.

Alternate one sentence review:

Half-Life 2 meets Saving Private Ryan meets 28 Days Later.

One Sentence Movie Reviews: Go Fuck Yourself Edition

The Departed
While it is an excellent film in its own right, I feel it loses much of its moral ambiguity as compared to Infernal Affairs.

Many of the detail changes between the two films seem designed to make the good guys better and the bad guys worse, almost as if the movie has been dumbed down for American audiences. Other alterations contribute to the movie, but seem highly unlikely (Costigan's affair with Sullivan's girlfriend comes to mind). To be fair, both versions have their share of implausibilities, so I'm not sure I can take points away for that. The final product is a movie that is much grittier and feels more real, but which is lacking some of the stylistic flair and philosophical questioning of the original.

Jack Nicholson is insane.


I'm bored, so I made these. I can't decide which I like more. Your thoughts?



The original.

One Sentence Movie Reviews: Samurai Western Edition

The Magnificent Seven
Questionable acting by the secondary cast fails to ruin an otherwise excellent movie.

Man, Yul Brynner is awesome. Steve McQueen is awesome. Charles Bronson is awesome. James Coburn is awesome. Everyone in this movie is awesome - as long as they have top billing. Otherwise, it's a mixed bag.

There's one thing I noticed during Casablanca and again during this movie. People getting shot looks hilariously unrealistic. I'm not sure if it's the lack of blood caps or the acting, but something about it seems really off.

Well, now I have to watch The Departed and The Seven Samurai and A Fistful of Dollars and Yojimbo. Better get to it.

Blasphemies, etc.

Well, it happened. After eight days of movie watching, I skipped a day. I suppose it was inevitable, really. In any case, I'll try to watch one tonight, before my first day of work at Dick's.

That's right, I'm interning for the ghost of Richard M. Nixon.

I leave you now with proof that my nephew is The Best Baby

One Sentence Movie Reviews, Part what, IIX? Damn.

Casablanca
Hot damn that's a well-constructed movie.

With all the classics, you find yourself wondering sometimes whether they were great at the time, but now seem quaint or outdated. Well, that wasn't the case with Citizen Kane, and that's not the case with Casablanca.

One Sentence Movie Reviews: Nicholas Cage is People! Edition

Adaptation
A good movie about a guy writing a screenplay about a book about a guy with a woman and there's another guy in there somewhere.

Pulp Fiction
Quentin Tarantino likes it when people talk.

I liked Adaptation, but I think if I saw it again I'd like it more. There seems to be a lot going on that you'd miss if you weren't looking for it. Brian Cox is awesome; I noticed this the first time around.

One thing I missed the first several times I saw Pulp Fiction: Kathy Griffin is in it. Seriously, I never noticed. And yes, it is a 13 year old movie, but I saw it last night at Red Rock Amphitheater, and it was sweet. They even had a surf band playing before it, and they were sweet as well.

Sweetness all around.

One Sentence Movie Review: Only One? Edition

Chinatown
Either I'm missing something or that is one hell of an overrated film.

Seriously, if Brick was the movie that pleasantly surprised me, Chinatown is the one which left me scratching my head and asking "that's it?"

I like to think I'm not just a movie escapist who needs everything to end with sunshine and rainbows; I find Requiem for a Dream amazing, and it makes me want to never get out of bed ever again. But I wouldn't say Chinatown has a depressing ending; for it to be an ending at all the players have to learn something, or at least change in some small way. I would be hard pressed to name any character changes from the beginning to the end (going from alive to dead doesn't count).

It's not all black marks from me. The acting is all top-notch. The feel of LA in the 30s seemed real, and the heat of the drought bled off the screen. I just didn't feel what the movie was trying to tell me, and found myself not caring about what it was, anyway.

One Sentence Movie Reviews: Heists and High School Gangsters Edition

Inside Man
You could say movies about "the perfect robbery" are cliche as they come, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't watch the good ones.

Brick
I would me remiss if I said this wasn't probably my favorite movie I've watched so far.

Seriously, I really liked Brick, maybe more than anyone I've talked to about it. Does this mean I'm nostalgic for high school, or nostalgic for the 30s? IMDB to the rescue once again, informing me that the role of the assistant vice principal is played by none other than Richard Roundtree. Why did I not see this?

I believe this last batch of movies means that I've watched more in the past 5 days than in the entire year before that. Someone please give me a job.

One Sentence Movie Reviews: 100 POSTZ!! Edition

The Aviator
I really can't come up with any witty remarks about this well-made movie.

Dr. Strangelove etc.
It's 96 minutes long, and I'm reasonably sure I could cut 10 or 15 more out of it.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the movie. It has one of the funniest final lines in recent memory. But it's Stanley Kubrick, the man who would later give us A Two and a Half Hour Shot of A Spaceship Gliding Towards a Large Object in Space. As a side note, IMDB tells me that James Earl Jones' character was named Lt. Lothar Zogg. Win.

As for The Aviator, I mean literally what I said. It's well-directed and acted. I enjoyed watching it. It will probably not go on any favorite movie list of mine.

Umm, it's really long and has Alan Alda in it?

One Sentence Movie Reviews, Part III

Perfect Blue
OMFG what's going on.

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly
How does an Italian make such a damn good western?

Perfect Blue is disturbing and violent and excellent and has rekindled my desire to watch the annie-mays; TGTBaTU is stylish and violent and excellent and has rekindled my desire to watch Clint Eastwood pretend to do things on film.

Topic switch!

Imagine my delight upon reading my BBC news feed and seeing this headline:


Alas, it's about virus-infected computers, not virus-infected humans.

Damn.

One Sentence Movie Reviews, Part II

Life of Brian:
I mean, I guess it's funny.

Infernal Affairs:
I do so enjoy a good identity drama.

Also, I'm about two thirds through Perfect Blue. Diagnosis: disturbing.

Next project: watch The Departed, discuss, repeat.

One Sentence Movie Reviews

North by Northwest:
I want to have a threesome with Cary Grant and Eva Marie Saint.

Road to Perdition:
I never knew Tom Hanks could be so menacing or Jude Law could be so creepy.

But seriously, North by Northwest is fairly to greatly awesome. My one complaint: the ending seems incredibly sudden. DANGER DANGER DANGER DANGER hey we're ok PHALLIC IMAGERY THE END.

Road to Perdition is excellent. I don't really know what else to say about it.

Black Rebel Motorcycle Club

Check out this sexy cover of the new BRMC album:


And it's a great album, too.

No Shortage of Ego

As ridiculously narcissistic as it is to post pictures of oneself to one's blog, I made these. I blame you, Matthew.

This one is a composite of two layers, the one on top set to a low opacity, with cutout and blue filters applied, as well as level-shifted towards the bright side.


This one is blue. You may have noticed.


This one I sent in to our university newspaper today. It'll get printed, maybe? Considering the current state of their comic department, it's a definite possibility.

Albumz

Best album cover ever?

Eh, probably not. But still!

Ok, I'm lazy and don't want to come up with, like, content, so here are some more covers I like. Perhaps some you haven't seen? This is ok.

Bird and Energy

I saw Andrew Bird in concert tonight. I hadn't really heard all that much of his music, aside from what my roommate played from time to time, and I was very impressed by his live performance. He plays solo violin, guitar, and whistling, and he loops his playing to create an intensely layered, vibrant, and ultimately beautiful landscape of sound.

Unlike a lot of musicians (read: DJs) who use laptops or turntables to loop sound more or less statically with additions or modifications piled on top, his method is far more organic. One of two foot pedals starts recording either a 13 or 26 second track; the shorter length means the looped sample is taken down an octave, giving a deep bass sound from a violin. The loops keep recording over one another, and older tracks gradually fade away, leading to a sound that gradually morphs from one feel to another. As he put it, the system allows him to see the melody "hanging" in front of him, so he can intuitively sculpt it with each iteration of the loop.

Add to that a pair of the most bad-ass speakers you will ever see, and he really has his act together. Most of his recordings are with a band, but seeing him solo was really incredible. And the dude is a freaking incredible whistler. That sentence sounds really weird, but he hits notes I didn't think were possible.

As loathe as I am to link myspace, there are some tracks on there I'm sure everyone can agree are choice.


On a completely unrelated note, never drink Radioactive Energy. I got a can of it for free, and I still feel ripped off. Seriously, it tastes like rotting apricots. It's not like other energy drinks are setting the taste bar exceptionally high; I usually refer to Monster Energy as "cough syrupy," and that is honestly a compliment.

What the hell, Germany?

Ok dudes, you have got to see this. I work at our university library, digitally enhancing brittle scanned books for reprinting, and in my days there I have come across some odd titles. There's just something about the pre-1900 publishing world that seems to generate bizarre material

The book I worked on today was German, and it may have been a children's book, I think. Even for a 19th century children's book, it's strange. Check out these pages:





Yes, that's a monkey wearing a crown stabbing himself in the chest with a fork. Any thoughts?

I know how to use photoshoppe

I was just messing around with brush transparency and I made this. Not exactly what you'd call professional, but I kinda like it.

Yeats is Greats

Hey, a quick post from the radio station today.

Since this is a blog on the interwebs, here is what I am listening to. In this case, it is quite literal, since I'm sitting in a darkened room surrounded by thousands of dollars of audio equipment.

Apologies in advance if there's too much indie in the pants.

The Speakers - Yeats is Greats

This is a great example of how my love of bizarrely awesome album titles/art lead to an excellent musical find. I forgot my camera today, but you can check out a small pic of the cover from the site; it's far better in person.


Oh yeah, there's some music, too. Music in which the poems of William Butler Yeats are set to music. Yeah.


Secret Mommy - Plays

Somewhat folksy songs with a subtle electronica vibe. Glitches/beats here and there add to the acoustic guitar and sparse, almost bjorkesque vocals. That's right, BJORKESQUE, MOFOS. Also, bass clarinet? Mandolin? Cello? Bari sax? That's cool.


(Side note: I just played a jazz song on-air featuring a Moog synth on it.)


Fannypack - See You Next Tuesday

Did you want catchy-as-hell female-headed New York hip-hop?

No, you do. That wasn't a question. Especially when the beats are this funky-fresh.


More later, maybe.

So choice

What is that thing all up under your waist?
Oh ma God - it's a booty in ma face!

Whaaat, is it?
What, what, what is it is it?
Whaaat, is it?
It, it's your booooty.

Whaaat, is it?
What, what, what is it is it?
Whaaat, is it?
It's a booty in ma face!

(repeat 2x)

Batmanz

I sketched this at 3 a.m. Why was I not asleep at 3 a.m.? Goooood question.

Jade Empire

I play computer games quite a bit, and it's rare that I actually frighten myself by just how much.

I played Jade Empire for 10 hours, 17 minutes yesterday. Certainly not a world record by any measure, but it's enough to make me feel incredibly bad about myself. I've held off the urge to play today; I figure if I average just over 5 hours a day for two days, that's a little better, at least in theory...

Also: Mr. Zach Braff was at Northwestern this evening for a Q&A session. I went (along with a few hundred or so other people) to see him. I've always been more of a J.D. guy than a Zach Braff fan; he just rubs me the wrong was when he's not in character. I haven't seen any movie he's been in, so maybe I'm not allowed to complain. To put it bluntly, he just seems like a bit of a douche.

But he hooked up with Sarah Chalke, so he gets props. Mad props.

Syndication Marches On

Johnny Hart died. You may remember him as the man behind B.C. and Wizard of Id, two very long-running, very baseline comic strips.

Despite the small problem of, y'know, his death, the comics will continue. Does this seem bizarre to you? From the article:

Richard Newcombe, the founder and president of Creators Syndicate, which syndicates both BC and The Wizard of Id, said both cartoons would continue.

Family members have been helping produce the strips for years, and they have an extensive computer archive of drawings to work with, he told AP.

That's right. In the tradition of Sir Laurence Olivier, death is apparently not a huge handicap to creative works. I'm not what you'd call a huge fan of either of those strips, but I still think that they deserve more respect than that. Maybe I'm missing something, but this article makes it seem that these comics are going to be zombified for the sake of syndication. A computer archive of drawings? They're turning his life's work, the work of 49 years, into the newspaper equivilent of a clip-show? Does this really, honestly, truly seem like a good idea to them?

The man died. It seems to me that it would be more respectful and sensible if his creations remained as he left them.

The Continuing Adventures of my Tablet

Dear Game Developers,

Please stop taking away my fucking guns. Seriously, guys. What makes you think people like that?

Another issue: The Natalya Syndrome. If you decide to give your main character a sidekick/person to guard, make sure two things are true:

1) That person's attacks actually do something, and
2) The person knows not to fucking walk right in front of you while you are firing an automatic weapon. I mean, christ.

Love,
Bob

P.S. I like your games.



I just played through Infernal, and these two issues came up. Fortunately, the game is worth it. If you are into the 3rd person shooters (a niche genre, sure), you will be mighty pleased.

I drew this for some reason

Yes, that is a little person wrestling an alligator. I don't know why the alligator insists that his name is Karl Rove.

Yes, mild intoxication may have had something to do with this.